Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Due To Unprecented Demand Dunkin Donuts Opens Second Location On Paulina























DD dispatched an undercover researcher to study sales @ the 7545 N Paulina store last year. The numbers looked really good. But they wanted to know how to further increase profits. It just seemed to corporate that there was untapped potential.

Hidden in a CTA emblazoned vehicle the investigator studied foot traffic on 7500 North Paulina day in and day out for months. It quickly became obvious. The overwhelming majority of customers came from the southern Howard L entrance and bus stop.

People exiting the "L" closer to Howard Street found the Dunkin Donuts too far. They invariably shrugged their shoulders, scratched their heads and gave up. After the data was compiled and discussed DD decided another store was needed on Paulina.

Last edited 3/19/14 8 pm

Please continue reading for more pictures







9 comments:

Isadora MoonlightLonetree said...

OMG Don't worry about the words sweetie alls I care about is the DONUTS! LOLZ!

Willy Fisterbottom said...

The Rogers Park Society of Friends is a quiet and gentle community that most of you call Quakers. We support DD and buy their donuts because they don't harm animals, support trade in blood diamonds or exploit dwarfs in third world nations. We like DD and we buy their donuts every day.

Willy Fisterbottom said...

Dunkin is a scam operation. They make all their money from kickbacks they get from the cops who shake down hookers and junkies up in the jungle. I used to work Howard with my girls until it got sleazy.

Philip McGregor Rogers said...

Well which is it Willy? DD is a benevolent organization or dystopian nightmare?

Isadora MoonlightLonetree said...

Whoa OMG I think Willy might have had a few too many tokes. DD is awesome.

Organic peregrine terra cotta bricolage cruelty- free locally outsourced maple nut crunch said...

As long as they don't open a PaneraScares there I'm good.

Organic peregrine terra cotta bricolage cruelty- free locally outsourced maple nut crunch said...

I want a Krystal or White Castle

Mary Leahy said...

Hey, Phil, me new boy friend is keepin me busy and I ain't been here in a while. A friend tole me I hadda look at this dumb post. DD ain't opening a second store there. They're movin from the first store to the new one a little north. Geez, pretty stupid ta think they'd keep that first store open.

Philip McGregor Rogers said...

You are correct Mary, the copy editor forced this writer to run this story. "Phil, the readers out there aren't gonna want to read about some store moving two blocks north. That's boring. They wanna read bout some crazy scheme where DD eventually takes over the whole block!"